Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
