found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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