There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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