What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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