She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
