Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Old men and throwing up are my life now.

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  (504): Old men and throwing up are my life now. http://tfl.nu/h5tg
  Replies (10) Good night (695) Bad night (2347)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.

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  (504): Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid. http://tfl.nu/2kcb
  Replies (20) Good night (871) Bad night (4323)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ

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  (503): jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ http://tfl.nu/lpdd
  Replies (44) Good night (789) Bad night (5605)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...

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  (563): She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman... http://tfl.nu/mfcm
  Replies (48) Good night (1323) Bad night (6288)
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  (315): View more from New York

  i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.

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  (315): i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear. http://tfl.nu/94id
  Replies (10) Good night (5353) Bad night (1227)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna

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  (780): We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna http://tfl.nu/yjmv
  Replies (14) Good night (1793) Bad night (4450)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in

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  (248): So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in http://tfl.nu/mvwo
  Replies (15) Good night (7066) Bad night (1081)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.

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  (810): Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there. http://tfl.nu/7hmv
  Replies (12) Good night (1419) Bad night (4428)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.

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  (814): We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus. http://tfl.nu/cwxq
  Replies (16) Good night (1386) Bad night (1984)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis

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  (850): It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis http://tfl.nu/b0bh
  Replies (3) Good night (1426) Bad night (531)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?

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  (918): What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else? http://tfl.nu/xvvc
  Replies (5) Good night (982) Bad night (510)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  sorry

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  why?

  (301): View more from Maryland

  oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?

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  (301): sorry (304): why? (301): oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you? http://tfl.nu/0491
  Replies (2) Good night (2436) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"

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  (484): Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME" http://tfl.nu/xsgw
  Replies (6) Good night (681) Bad night (1097)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!

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  (617): Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon! http://tfl.nu/3ja6
  Replies (5) Good night (1184) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.

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  (425): He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night. http://tfl.nu/zs6o
  Replies (6) Good night (599) Bad night (952)

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