you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
