If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten