fuck your aforementioned shoe
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
