margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
