why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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