Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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