I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
