Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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