talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
