alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
i believe in u and ur pee
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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