Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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