We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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