Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
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