She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
