To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
