There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
