I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
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I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Will exercising make me less horny?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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