I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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