YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize