Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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