operation harelip BJ is a go
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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