I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
