just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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