sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
