All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize