Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
