I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
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