He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
