part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
