Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
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his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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