Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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