If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
