hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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