this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I wear drunk well.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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