Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
