when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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