ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
