Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Randomize
