we have pet lesbian snakes
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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