I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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