Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize