I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
