Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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