The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
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I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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