Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
did you just send me my own nude
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Randomize
